Yep, Team 601 wins another one !

Team 601 is back in action.

We'll be chronicling the season once again, for the benefit of those who enjoy high comedy :)
 

Meet this year's Squad

(Nicknames subject to change, due to the above mentioned possible moments of high comedy,
or that seminal moment that truly defines the elite, or of course, ridiculously lousy, player)

Coach Joe  "Missed the first 82 games, but these guys don't listen anyway"  Jansen

Coach Sabrina  "Team Mom and ER Shuttle Service"  Groothedde
 

Jason  "We choose when the screws come loose..."  Anderson

Eric  "Best Dive Ever"  Barske

Nick  "Do we keep the Jerseys for the Season?"  Bergman

Kyle  "Pai Gow!"  Briggs

Brian "We're winning another one!"  Chase

Shayne  "The Black Knight"  Cumine

John  "John those pants are a little snug"  Eddy

John  "Chocolate Cake!"  Grandt

Ron  "I have to move my feet playing D???"  Groothedde

Dan  "Toenails..."  Hohenstein

Bob  "The number goes on your back Bob"  Keltie

Dave  "Quoteless Dave"  Lowry

Andrew  "Finch..."  Rosenthaler

Mike  "Four by Four"  Sheehan

Jackie  "Those Ribbons are gay..."  Spresser

Matt  "I'm not filling water bottles"  Turnquist

Mike  "Matt did you actually score a goal?"  Turnquist

The Season:

(Or, "The Tournament", for those of you who watched that series on Versus last year...)

Click here for League / Team Standings and Stats

Game 1:

Short bench,   12 skaters,   lots of ice time,     vs Calahans. These guys don't like us much, and
apparently didn't like the game officials either, (Neff and Sanders - did a great job). Additionally,
they may not even like each other!   Through a couple of implosions on their own bench, coupled
with their "dealings" with the officials, they wound up giving us a couple of 5 on 3's. Bad Decisions.

601 wins it's first game, 9-2. Well, the score clock said 9-2 until about
3 minutes left in the game, when it suddenly turned to 8-3. Whatever.

Good first outing as we received far fewer penalties than the opposition, (for a change, well,
except for Sheehan - see his current nickname above), and it gave Barske the opportunity to
earn his "Best Dive Ever" nickname, (and this one will NEVER change). It was world-class...

Game 2:

Win # 2. 10 -2 over the Tailgaters. Good team in defeat though - classy group. Nothing stupid,
and just kept plugging away - total opposite of last week.   Seminal moments aplenty though!
Sheehan earns his Nick! - Four penalties and an EJ last week, 4 goals this week - "Four by Four"
it is. Hogie comes though and earns his as well - "Toenails!" (As this is a public website, we un-
fortunately can't print how he got it, but it'll get around soon enough :). Best Dive Ever made a
serious play to earn a new one, (Condor!), which brought the house, (and the Bartendress), down,
but we're sticking with Best Dive Ever for now. He got away with the ultimate can opener as well.

Monkees next week - this one will be big!

Game 3:

Best Dive Ever goes down!  Oh, wait, that's just not right. Best Dive Ever separates his shoulder
and goes down! Nope, that's just not right either. Ok, here it is, Best Dive Ever has an awesome
1/2 of the first period,  then separates his shoulder, then bails on the rest of the game. Yeah, that's
it. (Big thanks to Sabrina for pulling ER duty, and getting Best Dive Ever all drugged up and stuff.
Third degree separation. Some drugs, some beer, and he'll be back in a month. Thank goodness).

601 played the Monkees in game 3.   They're a really good team, (a little whiny, but a good team
none the less), and we'll be seeing them in the Final. Despite being seriously shorthanded - Briggs
and Turnquist donating their cash to the Vegas economy, Best Dive Ever out halfway through the
first period, and Bergman, his parents might read this but oh well, was apparently celebrating
the first day of summer vacation in a liquid fashion - 601 takes it to a shootout, after coming
back from a 6-4 deficit in the 3rd, and loses 8-7 after three shooters apiece.

Great game, great effort by both teams, and we play them again next Monday.
Should be a big game once again.

Game 4:

Great. 16 of them, and 8 of Team 601. Thanks to all who said they were coming to play,
and then didn't show up. Much appreciated. In spite of being seriously outnumbered, and
clearly behind the proverbial 8-ball, Team 601 came back from an 8-3 deficit in the 3rd,
closed it to 8-7, and then died from exhaustion and gave up one more for a 9-7 final.

One of the Monkees players pulled a Gonchar, (for those who saw the Cup game tonight),
and was taken to the hospital by the paramedics. Our thoughts go out to him for the best.
(He had full motion/feelings everywhere, but a ton of pain in the spine).
 

Game 5:

One for ages. Sheer will to win. Incredible. Everyone showed up for this one, and
seriously made up for missing game 4 by plain and simply putting on a show.

601 played the Shock Hers - the new team in the division. An entire team of kids all under
the age of 22, and all from various AAA and Junior teams. They're good. Really good.
But, they have a couple of fatal flaws  -  they think they're better than they are,  and
they're show-boaters. You know, the big 'dances' after goals and stuff like that. The
kind of players who are really good, but wind up never going anywhere.
They should be playing in nothing less than an 'A' league somewhere.

Anyway, 601 took them down, with a final score of 14 -13. In the handshake,
every last one of them looked like they lost their woobies. They were stunned.

Brief game synopsis:

Keltie - huge goal on a defensive pinch, (and even included a little toe-drag for dramatic effect).
Turnquist, Turnquist, Cumine line - one goal and great offensive pressure all game.
Lowry, Bergman, Groothedde line - one goal - made up for being minus 7 by
getting us within one near the end of the third.

Chase, Grandt, Sheehan line  -  what can we say?    Why haven't the Penguins picked these
guys up yet? Absolutely stunning line chemistry and offensive display.
They combined for 12 goals, points, and at times
 made the Shockers just look like defensive Peewees.
Words can't do these guys justice.

Absolutely incredible game by all. What a thrill!

Game 6:

See Game 1 above. Same Team, same "issues", and, if we're not mistaken, same score, (wait,
no, it was 10-3. Yeah, that's it). This team needs Prozac - seriously. Unbelievable.
 
Quote of the game? (Possibly of the season?) :
Jason Anderson: "Only we get to choose when the screws come undone".

High and Lowlites:

Lowlite: Keltie getting literally getting mugged all game long, and never getting a call.
          Poor guy spent more time adjusting his helmet than an NFL Line Backer.

Highlite: Briggs. Hands down. Gives a guy a kidney shot in the back, during a face-off,
           runs away, gets chased around the ice by the guy, and gets him to draw two
minor penalties - hook and a slash! World class funny.

Game 7:

Vs the Tailgators again, and somehow they forgot to bring a goalie. (How does that happen?)

They wanted to play anyway, so it subsequently became 'points night'. Well, almost, since
Groothedde, Keltie, and Rosenthaler all failed to get on the board, even with the wide open,
gaping, wide open, gaping, even more wide open, even more gaping, and yet even more
wide open net...  Absolutely ridiculous.

Cumine goes "Black Knight", and roofs one into the empty net for emphasis later in the game !!

Hogie discusses "man things" with Barske, (and no, of course, it's not printable).

Turnquist gives away the puck.  5 times.  In one shift.  And laughs about it.

Groothedde, after quitting smoking for an incredible 10 days straight now, (he swears he's done
forever), picks it up behind the net and goes end to end !!  And of course then loses it 30 feet
from the open net. 'Tard...

Fun game though. Everyone was up. Good times.

Well, not all good times. Groothedde Shares...

Game 8:

Vs the Shock Hers again, and 601's entire "Twelve Goal Line" from the previous match against
these guys was absent.   Eeeeek!    This could be ugly.

Nope, no ugly.   Turned out to be a really good game,   with 601 dropping a 6-4 decision.
Black Knight scores a couple of big ones, (against a really good goalie), Briggs misses, oh,
6 open nets, and Roso kept us in it all game by making one spectacular stop after another.

Great game, great effort, another fun one.

Game 9:

Vs the Monkees, again.

Black Knight dukes it out with a vegetable, (Carrot Top?), and comes out victorious!
Grandt discovers a love for Chocolate Cake!  Roso goes Finch on us after the game!

Oh yeah, the game. 601 put the screws to the Monkees this time, running to a 10-4
victory, while being shorthanded, well, um, pretty much the entire game. (It was 10-2
until about 1 minute left in the 3rd). Five of our goals were shorthanded, and once
again, the typical 601 3rd period explosion occurred, (both in goals and penalties).
Hampe and Golden handled it with aplomb however.

Fun game, good times, and Briggs didn't miss one open net this time.

Game 10:

Vs Callahans...

Guess we left it all on the ice last night, 'cause we sure tossed the whale tonight.
That South Park pic up above?  Yeah, that was us. Big Time.

We screamed, we sulked, we carried on, then we proceeded to lose 8-2 or
something ridiculous like that. Unbelievable.

Oh well, it's done. The beverages were still fine afterwards.

Game 11:

Vs The Shock Hers...

Quick report - Scribe's really busy today.  An 8-8 tie, after a shootout, and of course
the 'kids' were upset since they didn't win, (a few of them even left the ice before the
handshake. You just gotta love youthful petulance don't you ??  Or not.).

Unfortunately, once again, a few of 601's members decided to no-show.
This was an easy win had they been here. Oh well, a point's a point.

Spresser hates the Figure Skating ribbons on the ceiling...

45 days without a smoke for Groothedde - reality is starting to blur.

Game 12:

Vs Tailgators

Go figure.   All of a sudden these guys are a radically different team,   and Team 601
finds themselves down   7-5   to start the 3rd period,  (or maybe it was Knight's mul-
tiple penalty performance?). Whatever. A typical 601 3rd period ensued, culminating
in a 10-7 victory, and a 1st round Playoff Bye. 

Next Tuesday, 9:30, vs the Monkees.

Goal of the game goes to Best Dive Ever - 60 degree wedge shot, 2 bounces, then off
the blocker, off the arm, off the shoulder, over the shoulder, nuthin' but net. Classic.

Next week - Do or Die playoff game vs the Monkees

Game 13:

I'm not fat! (left hook, jab).  I'm not fat! (uppercut, jab).  How (bleeping) dare you call
me fat ?  I haven't had a slice of (bleeping) bread in 3 (bleeping) months! (right hook).

The altercation above involved Anderson, extracting some measure of revenge from
a team that A - Intentionally ripped the puck at our bench,  B - Grandstanded after
every goal - you know - the "we're so good" dances etc,   and C - body checked,
hooked,   slashed,   and basically committed every foul known to man,  since 601
DRILLED THEM 9-5 TO WIN THE GAME AND SEND THEM PACKING.
 

Kelts summed it up with aplomb after last nights' game  -  "It's just not 601 hockey unless
the cops have been involved.   At least once".   Yes fans, Arapahoe County's Finest paid
us a "locker room visit" after this one. (Just to see how we were doing, but oddly enough,
they just didn't get the "tire iron" comment Barske tossed out). The Monkees instigated
the whole incident, and fortunately the League Director saw the whole gol-darned
shootin' match and called the law just to be safe!

The last 2 minutes  turned into a fiasco with one of their players drilling Grandt from
behind into the boards, at which point Johnie got a hold of him, and began tossing a
few well placed haymakers over the refs head.  Then Jasons' fiasco above erupted
about 30 feet up-ice,  (also started with a hit from behind),  and finally, while trying
to pull Jason away from his attacker, Groothedde gets jumped from behind, (notice
a trend here???), and yet another brawl ensued. (The old guy held his own though,
and other than some abrasions on the forehead from being slammed to the ice face
first from behind, pretty much came out the victor on that one. He's proud, but at
50 years of age, is a hurtin' dog today and should know better).

After everything was said and done,  a "few" suspensions were dished out fairly to both
teams, the beverages tasted good once again, (the opposition of course didn't partake,
since most of them are under 21), and Team 601 rolls on to it's second Championship
game in a row. (However, with our now "depleted" roster, this one's going to be
the ultimate challenge, but we're nothing if not delusional, er, um, optimistic!).

Oh yeah, helmets off to Cohen & Kornowski. We gave them a handful when we finally
had just had enough, and denigrated into retaliation mode, but they handled it great.

Monday the 18th, 9:10pm, vs the Shock Hers, for the all the marbles.

(And it'll be all of their marbles, since they too are all under 21.
A whole team of Junior players home for the summer....)

Game 14 - the Championship !

Great game.  End to end action the entire match.  Goals Awarded, Goals taken away.
Penalties on both sides of the ice,   (some great dives,  some great hooks),   the Refs
got worked, the Refs worked us, the game was called well. Lots of whining by both
teams, (standard fare in championships isn't it?).

Black Knight forgets his skates and goes rental.     Groothedde breaks a rib,   (he's old
and just ran into the boards stick first - funny as heck). Mike Turnquist scores a world-
class game winner!   4-4 tie, 6 seconds left in the 3rd.   Mikey comes out from behind
their net with the biscuit, snaps one off,  goal.  Pandemonium ensues.  Amazing.

There are still some issues being sorted out regarding players on both teams meeting
the minimum number of games requirements,  but however it ends up,  this was a
great game by both teams, a great league/division to play in, and a great finish to
the season. Our sincere thanks to the SSAHL for putting up with us !!